Attune: Finding Unity with Others

Today, I had a spiritual experience at work.

I had a conversation with someone at work.  In conversation, I found I was judging them. 

At some point in the afternoon, I took a walk outside in the cold air.  Few people were walking around, so I took a seat somewhere secluded.

I sat and meditated on Yogananda.  I came to realize in this state, that the person I was juding came to my mind and I felt this thought: Do you realize you are one with this person?  What do you get by judging him?

I realized that judging this other person, was solidifing my eronious belief that I am seperate from others.  It divides one from another.  This division makes the ego feel "superior" and "better" than the other. 


On a gross level, I realized that I and this fellow shared similar desires, issues with the ego, frustrations, fears and so forth.  In that regard, we were the same.

In a more refined way, I contemplated that my spirit is not my body.  My consciousness is not just in the body.  If the expansion of my consciousness is infinite, then that of other people - including this person I judged, is also infinate in expansion.  As such, at some point, our consciousness' would be one.

I felt better connected to this person and others around me and went back to work feeling much better in general.

Work, Life, Furstration and Ultimate Love

I'm noticing that I figure out the real causes of situations now.  I recall back many years ago, I couldn't do that.  I would be swept up in emotion for months over something.  I would obsess about those who harmed me and hurt me.

But now, I can see the spiritual cause a few hours after an event, or a day or two.  But this isn't good enough.  I need to see the spiritual causation at the moment of the problem.

I will write a real life example that occurred to me this past week. 
The week started fine, but towards Thursday we had a problem at work.  It was a project that was rushed and given to me at the last min.  The expectations of upper management was that a miracle could happen.  Pressure was put on all of us to "just get this out to production."  Which we did, but then (now) have a problem.  I gave up lunches, weekends for this project and it was in no real shape to go live, but upper management just pushed on it to squeeze it out.  Now we had a bug.

The problem was a big one.  A big bug.  So, I worked 15 hours on the bug fix.  I didn't get dinner with my wife and I, till 11pm.  I wasn't in the best moods.  I felt this would come back to me as blame.  I was stressed, fearful, angry... a lot of bad feelings going on.


When my wife and i got back from dinner (around 12:20am) I had to work on a separate project.  That's a 16hr day now.  I finished up, went to bed and went to work.

I meditated in the morning and it helped me get passed the emotions in that moment - but a 10min meditation doesn't cover a multitude of problems.  As I was driving to work, I had a bout of road anger.  I lost it (as seen in a post here a few days back.)  I finally got to work - now feeling guilty for my loss of anger.  Only to get a tap on my shoulder to go to a meeting.


In that meeting a upper management entity is lambasting us for the bug that was in production.  He tells us he's disappointed and just can't believe we had this error in production.  He throws a few stones like "other issues we should have caught also."  He tells us he will take responsibility but he blames us.


Many would say "you had every right being angry.  He told you to push that live, when you were finding bugs saying he already tested this throughoughly..."  That's what i was feeling. That's what made me so angry.  All that hard work, lost, and not recognized.  All that was remembered was an error - that was created in part, by upper management forcing something live.


Then as I sat at my desk, I started thinking: Do I just study spirituality? or is it my life?  Shouldn't I see a spiritual lesson here? After all this is the forth major boss in my life who's been like this.

I began listening to Radio Ananda and feeling so wonderful.  There was a reading from the Gita - and it directly spoke to me... which I put the synopsis in a post on Friday.  

That's when an email came to me from a teacher at Ananda.  As I read it, it reminded me of my purpose.

I began looking at this situation and a few hours later, I realized - I can't be angry with upper management.  It's them I should feel empathy for.  Their actions are not against me.  They are to free me.  Everything in my life is a projection to help me get past the spiritual problems I suffer from.  Like my ego.

But on a less deep note, those who are being used to free me, incur for themselves problems.  So feel compassion for those like this upper management.  We all have examples in our lives of people like this, who blame us, or look down on us - BUT those actions don't hurt us.  We, spiritual followers, are breakign free of our body identification.  What could they possibly do to cause harm?  It is they, who are identified with the body, who are harming themselves.  As they get the karma for their actions they will suffer. So we, who are here for only one reason:

To bring people to God

Should try and help them.  Pray for them.  Have compassion for them.  Speak no ill of them.  Just love them, as God would want.

The karmic return of ego, self gratification, delusion - is more of the same.  Either in business, personal lives, family... The return will come - and people like this are identified with their bodies - they will be the ones who see this suffering come back in the world.

Let me not be like that... so I choose to break free and love the ones who are affected by the world, and remember I am unaffected.

It's a great realization - I need to get to this point IN THE MOMENT, next time (and there will be a next time, until I get it right) rather then wait hours or days to come to understand this.

Hong Sau: to destress

What Hong Sau is:
I learned about this breathing technique from www.Ananda.org and www.anandaonlineclasses.org (the meditation class offered goes into detail on it's use.) There are also some books that discuss it, like "How to Have Courage Calmness and Confidence." Which details the technique towards the end.

It was Yogananda who taught the technique in that book. It's a simple technique of inhaling and exhaling naturally through the nose. On the inhale you mentally say "hong" and on the exhale you mentally say "sau" (sounds like saw.)

While doing this, you put your attention at the opening of the nostrils. AFter awhile, you move your attention up the nasal caveity to where it connects with the brow. Feel the air movement while you mentally chang hong sau on inhales and exhales.

After awhile you migrate the attention to the spot between the eyebrows (Ajna Chakra or "3rd Eye") and continue the mental chant and focus. If attention wonders just bring it back.

I've started doing Hong Sau throughout the day.

I had a rough week at work and one day, I went outside and sat somewhere quiet and used the technique to slow the heart, remove the stress... and just get back to a peaceful center.

I was reading in "How to have Courage, Calmness and Confidence" yesterday:

When you act in the world forgetting God, you have changed your center from God to matter. This material nature will throw you into the whirlpool of change and will stifle you with worries and sorrows. Revert to your own true nature. Change your center from material desires to desire for God. pg 134.

Hong Sau allowed me to recenter. It really helped put things into perspective.

Money Money Money

Sometimes, society pressures make us want to "keep up with the Jones'" or "be like the next guy.

Recently, a good friend of mine, got a new job. It's an amazing opportunity. Since we do the same job, the first thing through my mind was a craving to be like this guy. It was a hallmark of success.

BUT - wait. I have my own karma to get through.

I can't live another person's life. It may not be what's "right for me" or what God wants for me at this point.

This desire, if not the right path, could end in futility. Thus Frustration.

My friend had the Karma to get into a great gig. That's awesome.

If I were to live someone else's life and goals and get a boost in pay, if it's outside of God's will either A) be a frustrating exercise or B) it won't happen, and be frustrating.

That's not to say, don't go for an opportunity. Go for it, without expectations. BUT if you know you're where you're supposed to be, there's no reason to move.

In my recent past - starting around 2008 I started trying to make extra income... I ran a few side businesses, and got into day trading. All of it, ended in ruin. I also tried selling my photography and art, and that ended in ruin.

Not only did my ventures fail, but then when I tried to stabilize and stop the ventures, I got hit with enormous problems that cost me a lot of money.

I would get an extra $5000 only to get hit with an emergency requiring $8000. It was a repeat of a problem, that was so coincidental, I began looking for a deeper reason behind it all.

I recently discovered, I had a deep seated desire to be "free" of debt so I could be "free" of relying on God for my daily life.

We are IN FACT, taught this from an early age. "Save your money," "Invest in a 401k," "Prepare for rough times." I'm not saying that's bad, but if the motivation is to be self reliant - then our need and dependency upon God is weakened.

We can be out of debt. We can have the money to meet our needs. But with the right motivation. If we are close to God, living a spiritual life - God will take more interest in guiding us. This can initially be frustrating. But once we see what's going on, it's liberating.

For me, I strive to never accept something that isn't paid for. Movies, DVD's, Music - I wont take it, if it's copied. I don't want the karma of 'theft' on my mind.

I also began Tithing. 10% given to a source of spiritual knowledge or inspiration. I currently divide the 10% of my earnings amongst 2-3 sources.

Pray believing that God will assist my needs.

Maybe God will give me a job that's as good or better then this friend of mine. OR, maybe that's the WORST thing for ME. The most important facet of life, for me, is being in God's will. I've had points in my life where I got enormous wealth, and squandered it, and left the spiritual path I was on. Those were incidents and lessons, due to having wrong motivation.

The motivation must be pure. The desire of having something, just to have it, is impure. For me, the reason to be out of debt (however I can achieve that) must be for goals that do NOT take away from God.

God is the Doer...

In everything God is the Doer.

This was told to me by some instructors from Ananda.

It has really helped me deal with stress at work. The whole "Why is this guy not pushing back on the project?" or "Why is he saying that?" or any other of endless complaints can end with this premise.

If God is the doer, don't complain. There's a lesson here, from God to me, so look for it.

The problem ceases being a problem, and becomes instead a reference point to freedom.

An example of this:
This past week - I had a situation at work, where I was getting frustrated. I look back on it now and I see the initial reason why I became upset.

It started like this: Someone at work, wanted to push more and more into something we were trying to release. This added pressure and stress on everyone to try and meet these changing goals. But if God is the doer, then this is occurring under the will of God. As such, I can't call this person names, or think negatively of this person. I can't. I see them only as doing the work of God. But what could the purpose possibly be?

Judging from my reaction - I must have a problem with being "pushed around" or in handling Greed/Desire. I say this because I had a reaction. Reactions in us are pointers to internal problems. In this case, I'm having a reaction to someone's greed. This guy was apparently "greedy" to get more things out in a release. This greed caused me to feel "pushed around."

First question I ask: Do I ever act this way with others? Do I ever throw my weight around to get what I want?

If so (invariably things that bother us are reflections of what's inside us) then this is a lesson to help me overcome my own tendency to do the same thing.

Second question I ask:What's the root cause or motivator that frustrates me? In this case, this person appears to have the root motivator of greed/desire. I have the same root problem, in other areas of my life.

So simply - this is a life lesson, not a frustrating person in my life. **Important Note: Life lessons aren't about the problems in others! They are always about the problems in US!** A lesson will never be "Oh i discovered this co-worker is a true dick." That's not a Life Lesson. A Life Lesson would be, "I see my own mistakes now, now I must find a way to work and resolve my similar problems."

It's hard to get to that conclusion in the moment. But start where we're at. If it takes a week to realize this. Great. In time, it will take less and less time - till you see the life lesson in the moment. You see, as the Buddhist's say, the emptiness of the situation.

Once we see the problem, then what?
So far, we've hit the nail on the head of where the problem is. But how do we fix it? In this case, I worked on issues of Greed and Desire - by uses of chants, meditation and prayer.
One mental chant that helped me is this one:
"I am Strong in myself. I am Complete in myself. The joy and perfection of the Universe await Inner Discovery."

Meditation, twice daily (morning and evening) for even a mere 15min at a time, helps tremendously. What I meditate on is either Universal Love or Expanded Consciousness. Expanded Consciousness, is meditating that you are not in the body. You are outside it, then expand your awareness... further and further expand - it removes the "I" and "ego" of self. It helps realize a universal oneness.

One Last Thing (perhaps the most important):
Don't forget to Thank God for the Life Lessons.