Desireless Action (Nishkam Karma)

I was reading "The Essence of Self-Realization" today at lunch and came across this great passage on page 99.

The question is posed, that desires lead to desires... like waves and ripples on the ocean... and if we must return for each desire to be fulfilled, it seems a endless task that we can never escape from.

Master though responds with this hope:
"What is it that causes the waves to rise and fall in the first place?  It's the wind.  Without wind, the surface grows calm automatically.  Similarly, when the storm of delusion abates in the mind, the waves of action and reaction subside automatically.
So what you must do is still the waves of your mind by deep meditation, and then, in meditation, rid yourself of consciousness of ego-involvement.  Once you cease seeing yourself as the causative agent, the waves of delusion may continue to rise and fall outwardly, but you yourself will no longer be affected by them."

Then on page 100, he continues:
"What it [Bhagavad Gita] recommends is nishkam karma: desireless action, that is, action without desire for the fruits of action.  If you act thus, you will gradually attain freedom from the bondage of karma."

I really liked reading that.  That page goes on with more advice, on seeing God as the doer, and other techniques. 

Desire for Art...

My birthday is coming up...

I've been sitting around playing with some 3D art tools - one of which is quite expensive. It's $699.

I "could" buy it, but should I? I'm not a professional artist. It's more of a hobby, I hope to turn into extra income. But I don't get paid for art - except small amounts of money for stock art.

I was reading "The Essential Bhagavad Gita" at lunch today and I came to the commentary on 3:35 -
Ask yourself inwardly, 'Will I feel freedom in this contemplated enjoyment? will I feel freedom in this desired love?'

The point there is will this gift to myself make me feel "free" or make me a victim of my desire to own this product?

Many times I find that my art is desire driven. I have a desire to be liked and respected by others and I try to create that by creating art. But it's all poor motivation.

I have also found myself so wrapped up in my art, I forget my wife, I forget to eat... That's not balanced.

Going back to previous verse - 3:34

Attraction and repulsion (regarding) sense objects belong to the natural ebb and flow of duality. Beware equally of them both, for they are man's greatest enemies!

The commentary on that verse is specific and shows the error with extreme like and dislike. I feel it's very difficult to admit this... but admit it I will - I feel it is an extreme 'like' on my part, with regards to my art.

A good feeling should come from the inward, spiritual heart. I'm not sure mine does.

The Land of No Desire Part II

I consulted my good friend and teacher, David Shoemaker. He's a great student of Thelema. I asked him about this passage from Liber LXV Chapter III. He sent me a quote from Crowley's own commentary.

"CHAPTER III

This chapter is attributed to Water; it deals with the preliminary reflections of Truth as apprehended by intuition, beyond any intellectual apprehension; and with the nature of the Understanding and the sexual instinct.

1 - 2

The sea is the Sensorium of the Soul, and the currents his tendencies -- those activities in which he finds pleasure. Until one has passed through the totality of possible experience (as divined by estimation of the actualities available in one's own case) one cannot reach the state in which all Desire is recognized as futile. Only when this is fixed can one perceive the Unicorn -- de Astris -- the single pure Purpose (it is white) whose name is written in the way now to be explained.

The collar represents completeness -- the ``infinity'' or ``eternity'' symbolized by a ring. It is round the neck, i.e., the seat of knowledge (Death -- the Visuddhi cakkra) and made of silver -- the metal of the Virgin Isis-Urania, who informs Pure Aspirations.

The name of this Unicorn (whose horn signifies the creative power) is ``The Green Line winds about the Universe.'' Note the etymology of Viridis, connected with vir and vis; also the idea of gyrat, reminding one of the aphorism ``God is He with the Head of the Hawk, having a spiral force.''

The Green Line, here chosen to connote the Limit of the Universe, suggests the Girdle of Venus. The boundary of Existence is thus not a fixed idea, but an ever-growing Vegetable Principle of Life, of the nature of Love. Summing up the doctrine, one may say that the intelligible expression of the pure creative Idea is the omniform principle of Growth."

It seems Crowley's commentary on the inspired writing is that one must travel the ocean of their own pleasures and fettishes until they are of no more power over them.

Personally - I disagree. I respect Crowley's view, but there are many examples in many different traditions where the participant overcomes pleasure to great degrees through the use of meditation. The Dalai Lama, Paramhansa Yoganada, my friend Lama Marut, and many others.

Crowley's methodology seemed to work for him - despite the naysayers he didn't die of a drug overdose. he was a heroin addict but overcame his addictions prior to his death. But how many people can do that? it's a match to gasoline. There's a much safer approach, that's tried and true for 3 thousand years - the path of Meditation.

Yogananda spent a lot of effort to get to a point of non desire and non attachment through a) Affirmations b) meditation c) yoga.

Either way, Crowley was also in the the same vein that Desire and Attachment MUST be overcome.

I lost a battle...

This morning I lost a battle with my mind and it's attachments.

It's very frustrating, because the same thing happened just the day before. I felt then, that I wouldn't repeat the same mistake... and here I was repeating it again this morning!

One thing I've noticed is that when I first wake up, i'm at my most vulnerable mentally. I'm more easily to get frustrated, bothered, attached, desire driven. It's at these moments I need to prepare.

Ananda Online's class: Inner Peace has the advice of saying an affirmation out loud and mentally before going to bed and upon arising. That would help I'm sure. I think another thing I could do is get active once I open my eyes.

Ananda's class (Inner Peace) has several other techniques. The following is taken from the course material of the online class: Inner Peace from Ananda Online:
Techniques That Work
- When you first feel a strong emotion coming on, catch it, and divert the energy before
it takes hold of you and is impossible to shake. Reasoning doesn’t work. Reason follows
feeling, and your feeling has already turned into agitated emotion.
- Do not make decisions or even try to talk things out when you’re upset. It’s too easy to
say something regrettable. Wait until the intensity has passed, and then come back to it.
- Get calm and centered in yourself. Do some deep breathing.
- Begin tensing and relaxing your body. Energetically breathe in when you tense, breathe
out as you relax. When inhaling visualize light coming into you, and on the out-breath
expel all darkness and negativity. Do this 4-6 times.
- Leave the situation and take a walk or do something active.
- Visualize your emotion lifting upward within yourself from the heart chakra to the
spiritual eye. Clean and purify your heart, cutting off all attachments.
- Focus your gaze at the spiritual eye, and at the same time watch your breath going in
and out. Let your mind go blank for a moment, and feel that state of perfect quietude.
Now allow only positive and peaceful thoughts to enter your mind. Think of a happy
memory, a joyful experience or something you are glad about.
- For long-term solutions, avoid emotional people as much as possible. Mix with people
who are calm, uplifted, joyful, and centered. If you have to be around negative or
emotional people start being strong in your center. Be the dominant calm, peaceful
energy that can’t be swayed by their reactions. As you change you will find that others
around you change.
- Get out of self-involvement through service. Volunteer somewhere, help a friend,
phone someone who is lonely.
- Watch what you eat. Certain foods heat up the nervous system and cause negative
emotions.
- Get plenty of exercise. Exercise can ward off depression and sometimes even cure it.
Getting enough exercise helps to calm, balance, and even eliminate negative emotions.
- Sing, listen to uplifting soothing music (not rock and roll, rap or heavy metal.)
- Find and develop an uplifting hobby to channel your creative energy. Work with plants
and animals. Limit the amount of television and movies you watch. What may seem
stimulating at first quickly becomes enervating.
- Train yourself to think positively. Don’t accept negatives thoughts when they enter
your mind. Learn to speak with positive words and inflections.
- Live from your heart. Visualize your heart opening, letting go of all fear and negativity.
The more you live from your heart, the more the world will respond positively to you.
- Don’t have expectations. Give up thinking that people and the world should respond to
you the way you want. Be realistic and get yourself into perspective.

Desire in the shape of an iPad

I came to work today, and they gave a drawing for an iPad 2. In the contest, my submission was not taken as the winner. In fact the winner was 11 people who had the same concept. Each one got a brand new iPad 2.

I found in my heart a hardness... a jealousy. I found I had an issue. It bothered me for hours. I felt the desire for the iPad and felt "I deserve one too!"

Then I realized and remembered "I'm not this little self that cares so much about a electronic device. I'm a spiritual seeker."

I let it go. I called my daughter in France and talked to her and sent her a little book today.

Wrong desires, desires of the ephemeral or of the negative, can so warp our true calling.

Handling Desires

From the material on Desire in the Ananda Online Class: Inner Peace -

"When desires plague you it’s good to immediately short-circuit them. As soon as you
become aware that you’re starting to wish for something, that there is a longing feeling in your mind, mentally cut the energy off from it, and turn your mind in a different, positive direction. Do this by thinking of all you already have that makes you happy. It may also help to take a few deep breaths and visualize your exhalations carrying away the desire.

Affirm contentment. Look up the affirmation on Contentment in Prayers and
Affirmations for Self Healing, one of the companion books to this course. Repeat the
affirmation often.

Desires are energy. It’s important to positively channel our energy, not suppress it. Therefore when you have a strong longing that stays with you, transmute and expand it beyond your own self. Fulfill the desire by doing something that will also benefit others."

Expanding or Contracting desire

I was listening to Swami Kriyananda tonight. He was talking about desire. He made an interesting point that got me thinking. He said that a desire to do something that has a root motivator of expanding ourselves (meaning to share or uplift others) then it's a good thing. But when we have desires to benefit ourselves, our ego, then it's not a positive thing.

The example he gave was wanting more money to share with others vs. wanting more money to be a selfish hoarder of possessions and wealth.

After listening to this I thought about my artwork. I've been so into my artwork. I've used tools to do this work, but for what reason? to share with others? To uplift others? No. My deep root motivation was in the attention I can get from others. That's ego. My desire was wrong.

I need to transfer my art to something that is a shareable aspect. Something that gives back to others.

All my desires should be towards that end - uplifting others.