Desireless Action (Nishkam Karma)

I was reading "The Essence of Self-Realization" today at lunch and came across this great passage on page 99.

The question is posed, that desires lead to desires... like waves and ripples on the ocean... and if we must return for each desire to be fulfilled, it seems a endless task that we can never escape from.

Master though responds with this hope:
"What is it that causes the waves to rise and fall in the first place?  It's the wind.  Without wind, the surface grows calm automatically.  Similarly, when the storm of delusion abates in the mind, the waves of action and reaction subside automatically.
So what you must do is still the waves of your mind by deep meditation, and then, in meditation, rid yourself of consciousness of ego-involvement.  Once you cease seeing yourself as the causative agent, the waves of delusion may continue to rise and fall outwardly, but you yourself will no longer be affected by them."

Then on page 100, he continues:
"What it [Bhagavad Gita] recommends is nishkam karma: desireless action, that is, action without desire for the fruits of action.  If you act thus, you will gradually attain freedom from the bondage of karma."

I really liked reading that.  That page goes on with more advice, on seeing God as the doer, and other techniques. 

Discipleship Initiation today

Today was a very special day for me.  Today at about 12:30pm, I was given Discipleship Initiation at Ananda L.A.

Discipleship Initiation in this case, is a decision to follow Paramhansa Yogananda as a guru.   The reason to have a guru, is to have a spiritual guide, to guide one through the pitfalls of life.  Each of us has our own pitfalls, addictions, problems, frustrations, buttons that get pushed, etc.  As much as we can try and believe we know our own mind and problems, it's just unlikely we know each of our problems.  Nor do we know each of our paths to our greatest good.

The guru is a spiritual teacher, the disciple attunes to.  By attuning to the guru the student learns how to live best, and how to grow best.  What pitfalls to avoid and what secret paths to follow. 

All this for one purpose... for the student to become the guru.  That is to say, to become united and yoked with God/The Divine. 

I could have done the discipleship initiation by myself - but I really felt I wanted to be in the presence of other devotee's.  At the advice of my Discipleship teacher, I reached out to the local Ananda location (www.anandala.org)

The day went well.  I got up early.  I planned to call my daughter, but ran out of time.  I took a shower and got dressed in all white.  I got my rose and donation ready and then it was time to go.  It was raining, but I got there early.  I met several people and had a brief talk with Dharmaraj. 

The pre-service was chanting - which was so amazingly peaceful. I've seen the chanting remotely online, but being there was so different.  The peace of God just flowed so powerfully.  In that space between chants, the air just was filled with a peace almost tangible. 

The service was a talk from Dharmaraj on Karma and Reincarnation.  It was a great talk.

Towards the end of the service is the Festival of Lights ceremony and then at the end - the Discipleship Initiation occurred.

It involved a brief talk about it - then a reading - in this case, the reading was God's Boatman.  After the reading the initiation itself.  It was very nice. 

Afterwards there was a lunch, and I talked a bit with Dharmaraj.  I was very much at peace. 

One might ask, "Isn't this blog called 'Finding my Guru'?  Nlow what? you found him."  True, I did find my guru, but I'm still digging deeper to find him inside.  To find my guru in my thoughts.  To build the attunement stronger and deeper - to see God's hand in all things.  There's still finding the guru... It's discovering deeper connections with the guru.

Do you want me to worship my mistakes?

http://www.anandala.org/mp3/2011-11-13sunday_shivani.mp3

The title for this post comes from a quote that I heard in the link above.  The link at the top of this blog post is from Ananda LA. The speaker was quoting someone who after leaving her spiritual path, returned and some other devotee's where upset about this person returning again.  Similar to the Prodigal Son story of the New Testament.

The woman said to those upset by her return to the spiritual path: "Do you want me to worship my mistakes?"

I really liked this comment. It brought some ideas to my mind:

First, it's never too late to return to the spiritual path. As long as you can think thought, you can return.  Don't loose heart. Don't feel you've 'done too much wrong.'  Don't also obsess about "but which path is right?"  Just seek God and it will work out.

Second, those of us on the spiritual path, shouldn't look down on others who have made mistakes.  Some reasons to avoid this are:
a)  Even the mere thought of frustration with someone who left and wants to return - we are mentally creating a division.  We are saying "They are not me... I'm doing what's right.  They failed."  That division is Ego.  Ego is the identification with the Body.  The more we loose the body and think in terms of consciousness, we see ourselves as ONE with each other.
b) Also - by pushing others out, thinking "who are they to think they can come back" we are forcing them to worship their mistakes.

Gratitude for Everything

I'm thankful for everything.

I meet people from time to time, who remind me of who I used to be.  People that assume I should be upset with some spiritual paths that I took in the past, that seemingly were fake paths (this usually comes up with the subject of Scientology.)

I used to be upset with certain situations in my life and regret them. For me I didn't normally regret my spiritual decisions. But I mostly regretted things in my past - a divorce situation, family situations, work situations, etc. 

But I realize now, that everything got me to where I am now.  Where we are now, is important, because it's from this moment that you find God.  It's not "well if i take a class/course in the future I'll find God."  It's not "if I only did different decisions in the past, then I would have been at peace with God."  That future and past thinking is only going to create stagnation.

The only thing you can say, is that everything that happened to you (good and bad) got you to this point, this present moment - and this moment is defined by you - right now, right here, you can find God.  You can start the path.

Be happy for everything.  Never feel animosity over the past.  Don't feel that you "could have done things better."  Don't obsess on the past, nor on some future point of reference of "well some day I'll make changes..."

Be happy. You can find God now.

If you want to find a path to help with this - it's probably right in front of you.  If you can't see it, then open your heart in prayer and ask for help from God.

A job may seem difficult... a partner may seem frustrating... But all of these things are here to help you. To help you find your ultimate potential.  In the moment, it's often too hard to see any upside, but there is an upside.  We can find God through trials.  Without trials, there would be very little push for us to improve.

Imagine a smith trying to make a sword from a block of iron.  If the block just sat on a table with no resistance it would never change.  It requires the melting of the iron, then later the shaping, sharpening, hammering and then thrust into an ice bath.  If one were that block of iron, one would think that they are going through hell.  But in the end, it is becoming the perfect image of the sword.

Similarly, we go through trials (loss of work, loss of spouses, angry people, desires, etc.) and we do that so we can become closer to God.  It's our reason for being here... to overcome.

So let's have gratitude for today.

Racism and Judging Others

The other day, I was confiding in a friend of mine about some situation I was going through with some people.

To my surprise, he responded with a racist comment.  Not something said lightly and not said in jest.  But with a matter of fact attitude that "Hate to say it but that's what you get from __________"

It hit me. 

I realized a few things in that moment.

I realized how different I was from this friend of mine.  I was so far different from him.  There's no way I would ever bring something down to race. 

Looking at my friend's life, I began to realize why all these bad things happen to him.  Many times he has said to me, "Why did [some person] judge me when I worked at [some job]?"

Many people have judged him.  In fact he's one of the most judged persons I know. 

But now I get it. 

Life isn't just a random act.  Life is a spiritual classroom.  It's a constant experiment. 

Every action we do, does return to us in some way - usually delayed with time. 

But if you look at his life of being judged by his employers, employees, co-workers, friends, enemies... Then see the fact he has judged so many people - by their work, by their race, by some insignificant trait...

there's the equation... which, incidentally is spoken in the Bible, "Judge not, lest you be judged." 

If you find yourself being judged often... Stop complaining.  Start looking into your own life.  Do you judge others (mentally, or openly)? 

The only way out, is through change.  Inner change.

Attunement and the Guru

In the last chapter of the Discipleship Course at www.anandaonlineclasses.org, there's some really good references to what attunement to the Guru and the Divine Ray is all about.

As I interpret the writing, the idea here, is that God sends many Divine Ray's through the Universe.  As people find a ray they are called to, and they attune to the ray - they will grow in the attributes of that Divine Ray.  They will gain Love, Kindness, Inner Radiance, Peace, etc.

Regarding attunement itself, there are different levels - which have a different return to us.  I'll quote the material here:

"-For one, that those who serve this work selflessly are those also who gain the most from

it;

- That those, again, who try to share with others the light they receive gain more,

spiritually, than those who keep it to themselves. (As Paramhansa Yogananda said, “The

instrument is blessed by that which flows through it.”);

- That they gain the most who seek attunement with others more advanced than they

themselves are on the path;

- And that they gain the most, finally, who realize that soul-attunement with this path is

more important even than long hours spent in meditation, without the companion effort to

establish such inner attunement."

An important aspect of the Divine Ray is service.  By service our attunement grows deeper and stronger.  How do we serve?

We serve through becoming transmission stations of the Divine Ray.

What does that mean?
That means, we radiate conscoiusness (of the blessings we have recieved) to all existence (people, plants, animals, the world around us.)

Also - spend time with other people in attunement.  As the chapter states:

For yourself, too, if you want to be more in tune with the ray that is shining through this

work of Self-Realization, seek out those who are already in tune with it. I have seen over

the years that those who sought their attunement with Yogananda, but who didn’t also

recognize the need for personal contact with living instruments of his ray, have not

received nearly as much.

If you doubt, the text says to test this by doing the following:

Those who live in tune with the divine ray will manifest

in their lives increased love, harmony, and joy. More especially, they will radiate those

particular qualities which belong to that ray. But those who work against the ray will

manifest in their lives a growing disharmony, and diminution of love.

Regarding which Guru...

Lately, I've been looking at some books by Swami Kriyananda on Amazon.com.  Several times I have come across individuals who evidently have made it their life's purpose to slander or discredit Kriyananda in their reviews (or in comments to positive reviews.)  Their comments are not about the books in question, but point to slander websites or state incorrect information about Kriyananda and Ananda.

The individuals I'm referring to, represent SRF (as they state in their posts), as either students of SRF or otherwise.  I realize delusion and mistakes of individuals do not represent the whole of an organization...So I can't say "SRF wrote that" but rather, people who are attached to SRF wrote that.

One individual reports that Kriyananda set himself up as the new Guru, after Yogananda passed.  To clarify this, I was reading in Swami Kriyananda's book on Discipleship quite the opposite.  Swami Kriyananda put in writing his point that he asks people to see him only as a channel for Yogananda - not as the substitute for Yogananda. 

I don't normally belabor points like this... and I ended up replying to these negative comments on Amazon.  I really shouldn't get drawn into it.  That was my mistake.  But for those who are earnestly seeking, I offer the quote below from Swami Kriyananda's book on Discipleship, which explains clearly how he feels about his relationship - not as a Guru - but as a channel for the Guru (Yogananda.)

Several people have told me, or have written to say, that, as I feel toward Master, so they
feel toward me. I had a dream last night which may help to clarify that thought. I won’t
relate the dream itself, as it was personal, but I took it as a warning from Master to pass
on to all of you.

The essential difference between attunement with Master and attunement with me is that
Master lives eternally in cosmic consciousness, whereas I am still struggling to reach that
state. What he channels to us is the Infinite Lord Himself. What I am able to channel to
you is whatever I have succeeded so far in experiencing within myself of Master’s
consciousness. That I feel his bliss is a cause of deep gratitude for myself. But I feel it is
very important for everyone to realize that whatever I have to give anyone is not, and
must never become, personal. To the extent that anyone takes it as such it can be binding
not only for that person, but also, potentially, for me.

Therefore I plead with you—for my own sake quite as much as for yours: “See me only
as a channel for our Guru.” I try my best to serve you in that capacity, and am grateful if,
to any extent, I succeed in that effort. If, however, I seem to be for some of you—if only
by default!—the best instrument you’ve found during your search, please always
remember for what, and for whom, this instrument lives. I have no other desire than to
bring you closer to God by bringing you into deeper spiritual attunement with my Guru.
He is our actual, ever-living channel to God.